


Jealous guy

by millygal



Category: Life on Mars (UK)
Genre: Crack, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-22
Updated: 2017-04-22
Packaged: 2018-10-22 13:32:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10698045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/millygal/pseuds/millygal
Summary: Well that plan backfired a bit....





	Jealous guy

**Author's Note:**

> This comes from some where out in left field...Uh, no real explanation for it but...have a read, made me giggle anyway ;)

You're never quite sure of the proper procedure when you wake up between two of your officers. Gene's not entirely certain he's woken up at all, perhaps he's just dreaming and this is some kind of latent fantasy.

That theory's fine except, he's never woken up on the wet patch in any of his dreams. Nor has he ever been presented with a rather large, slightly hairy arse belonging to Ray Carling before.

Just to make sure he is in fact conscious he reaches out a hand and pokes the arse currently resting on the pillow next to his head. He hears a grunt from somewhere beneath the covers and the arse in question shifts a little closer to his nose. 

Right, definitely awake then.

His memory's coming back in dribs and drabs. He distinctly remembers getting pissed, nothing new there then. He also recollects letting Ray and Chris buy him a lot of his rounds, much to Sam's sulky annoyance. After the seventh of eighth tumbler full of whiskey, it all gets a little hazy.

Wait, if he'd been drinking with Ray **and** Chris, that means...

Gene turns his head a fraction and comes face to face with a slack jawed and drooling DC Skelton. Ah, right then, definitely not dreaming.

Ok, not that he's complaining but...how in the hell did they go from throwing insults at Sam in the pub to shagging like jack rabbits back at Ray's gaff? That assumption would be a bit of a radical leap if he weren't sandwiched between two of his best friends and he didn't ache in places he'd previously thought it impossible to ache in.

Taking a quick peek beneath the covers, he finds that he's misplaced his clothes and he's still fairly vague as to where they might be. Bugger.

Well, well, well. Little Chris Skelton's a fairy, eh?

He already knew Ray was that way inclined, what with them sharing a few 'bonding' exercises back when he'd been a DC and Gene'd been a DI but he'd always thought that Chris was straight and Ray was just harbouring unrequited feelings for the soppy git.

Apparently not.

Unless of course this'd been Chris and Ray's first time but judging by Chris's satisfied smile and comfy position in the bed, definitely not a first time thing.

Neither Chris nor Ray are showing any signs of waking and Gene's left leg is beginning to go numb. Ray's got his moustachio'd face resting on it and he's cuddling Gene's knee beneath the covers. How in the hell is he gonna shift him without waking him? 

His banging head and hammering heart aren't up to confronting his DC and DS at this particular moment so he's gonna have to wait it out. Hopefully by the time they wake up, he'll have got his head round the fact that he's the office slag and is willing to shag not one but two of his officers. 

No wonder Sammy'd looked so ticked off last night. What must they have looked like, clambering all over each other in full view of the rest of the squad? Gene's memory's still struggling to resurface but he's pretty damn sure that Chris'd been about to duck beneath a table if he hadn't suggested they go somewhere a little more private.

Oh, it was his own idea was it, bloody wonderful. Office slag, more like office bike. That's another thing, he can't have been so pissed that he'd let either Chris or Ray...but according to the dull ache at the base of his spine and the bite mark he can feel on his left arse cheek, he must've done.

The arse still resting peacefully next to his head, waggles and slides down the bed a little, allowing Gene to shift his shoulder before his arm goes completely dead. Chris snorts, mumbles something in his sleep and throws an arm over Gene's stomach.

He feels a head nestle into his side and automatically wraps an arm round the body attached to it.

Anyone'd think he did this on a regular basis. They must look a right sight but he finds he's not actually that bothered at the prospect of having been nailed by either man. What does that say about him? Well, the same thing he's been saying about himself for quite a few years actually. He'd never expected it to be Ray or Chris he jumped into bed with, he'd been thinking more along the lines of Tyler.

Oh bugger, Tyler.

He's not gonna be a happy bunny, not when they've been practically throwing hints at each other for the last few months. Ok, this at least confirms that he's still willing to bang a bloke, he's just not completely convinced that he should've banged these blokes.

Chris's breathing changes pitch and Gene feels him wiggle beneath his arm. When Gene looks down at him, he's flashing a dopey smile and rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

"Mornin' Guv"

Gene opens his mouth but nothing comes out. What do you say to a bloke who's seen you naked and listened to you beg? How's he ever gonna shout at the little sod ever again? Not when he'll be able to remember Chris's tongue wrapped round his cock. Same goes for Ray. Shit, there goes the chain of command.

Gene shuts his mouth, closes his eyes and shakes his head, attempting to get his neurons firing enough for a reply. He's about to respond when a muffled voice grunts and he feels Ray's moustache twitching against his thigh.

"Would you two shu'up, I'm tryin' ta sleep"

The arse disappears beneath the sheet then Ray's sleep fogged face comes into view.

"Oh, mornin' Guv, sleep alrigh'?"

"Yea, sleepin' was fine. It's the wakin' that gave me a bit of a shock"

Ray chuckles and Gene feels Chris pull away completely and sit up.

"Uh, how, I mean...why exactly am I naked and stuffed between you two?"

"I think that'll be down to the 15 whiskey chasers you sank last night, Guv"

Gene looks from Ray to Chris and back again until his neck starts to ache then he scrapes his hands through his tangled hair and groans in humiliation.

"Shit, remind me never to let you two buy me another drink, ever again"

"Can we 'ave that in writin' Guv?"

"Cheeky sod"

Chris's looking a touch too smug for Gene's liking and he figures he might aswell bring him back down to earth, hopefully with a bump.

"Don't think jus' 'cos you've seen me starkers, you can get away with lippin' me"

"No, but you didn't seem to mind me tonguin' you"

That's it, he'll have to get a transfer, there's no way he's gonna be able to walk around the station knowing Ray and Chris have seen his best moves.

Ray slides a hand onto his hip and nudges Gene so he'll turn and look at him, "Don't worry Guv, we won't say nothin'. Strictly speakin' we're one bloke blokes but you was so hammered last night and...well you said somethin' about makin' Tyler jealous, figured we'd give you a hand"

"You gave me more than a hand, Carling, I've got bleedin' teeth marks on me arse"

Ray chuckles and shakes his head, "Sorry 'bout that, got a bit carried away"

Gene narrows his eyes and stares at Ray, "What d'ya mean I said somethin' 'bout..."

"...makin' Tyler jealous, yea. What you actually said was if the poncy git couldn't take a hint, p'raps he'd get the message if you went 'ome with us an' came back covered in love bites. Admittedly you'll 'ave to get ya arse out for him to see 'em but still, think we 'eld up our end of the bargain"

"So, you don't want, we're not..."

Chris snorts and Gene turns confused eyes on him, "Christ no. Sorry Guv, don't mean to shatter that fragile ego of yours but me an' Ray, we're...exclusive"

"Thank fuck for that"

*

*

*

Gene, Chris and Ray come limping into work looking a little worse for wear but smiling and laughing.

Sam looks up from his desk, scowls then goes back to his paperwork. 

Bloody exhibitionist sods. So much for decorum and police professionalism. It would have to be Ray that got to Gene before him wouldn't it? All these months keep scurting round something and it turns out, the Guv prefers his men with facial hair and a chip on their shoulder. Fine, it's no loss, he can take a hint.

Except, the scowl hasn't left his face and he's staring at the papers in front of him like they've just killed his cat or something.

He's just contemplating fleeing before he has to actually talk to one of them when he feels a hand come down on his shoulder. The smell of stale ciggies and day old whiskey forces it's way up his nose and he closes his eyes, tries to school his features and force down the bitterness rising in his throat.

"Gladys, a word"

"Uh, no..no thanks Guv, got a lot of...of paperwork to do"

"Did that sound like a request?"

He sighs, hangs his head and stands. Fine, better to get it out the way.

He follows Gene into his office and is acutely aware that Chris and Ray have both stopped talking and are staring at them. He can feel their eyes burning right into his back and it's all he can do not to turn round and flip them off.

If he's fair, it's not really their fault, it's not even the Guv's fault. They hadn't been, well, they'd never...so who was he to get in a huff when Gene did decide to....

He slumps down onto Gene's sofa and waits for him to say whatever it is he's after saying. He hears the office door click shut, the lock being flicked then the blinds being pulled. Oh, proper little clandestine meeting this is.

"Look Tyler, I.."

Sam holds up a hand, still refusing to look Gene in the eye and cuts across him, "No, Guv, s'nothing to do with me. You don't need to...I have no right and you didn't, we weren't..and anyway, who says I even care that you and.."

Gene watches Sam struggle and finds himself feeling so guilty he wishes the ground'd open up and swallow him. That's it, he's never drinking again, ok maybe not never but...

"Gladys, stop"

"Then add to the fact that we never even, I mean who knew you'd want to with them but I shouldn't have even...it's fine, really I didn't even want, not much anyway and.."

"Sam, shut up!"

Finally Gene's voice gets through and Sam looks up into eyes pleading with him to listen. Sam's own eyes are moist and threatening tears and he bloody hates himself for it. Gene's not his property, they haven't even said anything about it, not out right. It's been sly looks and veiled comments and he's got no right to even feel this upset let alone allow the Guv to see how much it's hurt him.

Gene steps away from the edge of the desk, lowers himself to his haunches and grabs Sam's flailing hands.

"I'm sorry"

"What for?"

"You know what for, I shouldn't have..we've been. Oh hell Gladys, how'd this get so bloody complicated?"

Sam's expression is making Gene's heart literally ache. He'd been so sure they were gonna..then he goes and does something so monumentally stupid that he might very well have fucked everything up.

"Dunno. Look, it's really nothing to do with me. can I just..." Sam tries to stand but Gene refuses to let go of his hands, forcing him to stay put and listen to what he has to say.

"Sammy, ple...I didn't mean to. Fuck it, look it was just a thing a one night thing and I'm not, we're not...I want...I've always wanted..."

Sam looks at him and Gene can see a little of what makes him so appealing leaking back into his eyes.

"What, what do you.."

"You, you daft prick, I want you"

"Then why'd you..."

"S'your fault, so bloody stubborn, couldn't just make the first move and then I got pissed and started spoutin' about wantin' you an' you not payin' any attention an' Chris an' Ray, they just..."

At the mention of his two colleagues, Sam's eyes take on a glint Gene's never seen before. It fills him with a sense of loss and he rushes to try and get Sam to at least listen. Stupid, he was getting somewhere. Why'd he have to say anything about them?

"No, Sam don't, look they didn't..it really didn't mean anythin'. We were all so hammered, I couldn't feel my feet let alone anythin' else"

"How can I...Ok, just for a second suppose that I believe you, how can I ever touch you knowing that Ray and Chris..."

"Oh for god sake Dorothy. I'm sorry right, I can't say 'out else to make you feel better. The fact that I apologised at all should give you a clue as to how bloody idiotic I know I am. Can't you just accept it for what it is?"

Gene's harsh words come as a shock but they make Sam fully aware of what a whiny girl he's beginning to sound like. They hadn't been an item. It's no different to Gene having a wife or him playing around with Annie. He's got no right to make Gene feel like a cheat when there's nothing for him to have cheated on.

"I just, I'm jealous, that's all"

Gene reaches out, takes Sam's face in his hands and runs his thumb along his jaw. He leans in and rests his forehead against Sam's, "How d'ya think seeing you running round with the plonk made me feel then, hmm? We'll, we'll start again. Pretend it never, ok, Ray and Chris'll never let me forget it but we can try and pretend it never happened, if that's what you want"

"No, that's ridiculous but you do know I'm gonna thump Ray the first time he makes some crack about it in the pub"

"I'll be sure an' hold your coat"

"New start?"

"New start"

Sam smiles and Gene goes to kiss him but Sam pulls back and grimaces.

"Wh..."

"You've got Ray breath, no way I'm kissing you 'til you've cleaned your teeth"

Sam smirks and winks at Gene who shakes his head and laughs, "You little...."

"In fact, I don't think I'm coming anywhere near you 'til you've gone home and showered in bleach **and** you can burn those clothes an' all"


End file.
